Memories Healing Grief

Embrace Grief, fill your heart with memories

I've been through loss many times in my life in rescue/hospice. I invest so much of myself into each animal we take in, their loss is always painful, always hard, and it never gets easier. I was once told by a friend who has spent a lifetime in rescue "if you stop crying for them, you need to stop rescuing".

I've tried many ways to deal with grief, but i've learned to embrace my grief. We need to hold that pain we feel like a precious little baby and comfort it until its calmed and resting again. Focus on remembering. We always say "you have your memories", they aren't ever enough and they HURT to return to. We want to block them out, we want to put up our shields and protect ourselves from that pain. But putting a wall around it doesn't resolve it. It rages behind the wall, waiting for a crack to get through and tear you down.

So look, look at the pictures, tell the stories, remember the special way they looked at us, the funny things they did, hold fast to their memories - especially when it hurts. Remember them until the memories make you smile again. We can bring them to life, for a moment, in our hearts, we can hold them. Don't let them go because it hurts to remember. Don't lose your memories because they carry loss. Experience them fully and cherish them, remember them every chance you get and re-love them.

"We who choose to surround ourselves with lives even more temporary than our own live within a fragile circle; easily and often breached. Unable to accept it's awful gaps, we still would live no other way. We cherish memory as the only certain immortality, never fully understanding the necessary plan" - Irving Townsend